I generally love social media and am an active user, but recently I’ve found myself getting increasingly irate every time I visit Facebook. This never used to happen – I remember I used to love scrolling through my feed and reading friends’ humorous updates. It was a light hearted and fun place. That was until the new breeds came along – the moaners, the sympathy seekers and the over sharers. Oh, and an influx of new Mums sharing a never ending supply of baby pictures. And don’t even get me started on the recent general election ranters…

However, what REALLY gets on my nerves are the words and phrases that seem to be taking over my feed. Here’s my list of the 10 worst, and if you’re a brand, take note. Tone of voice and language count for everything and if you don’t get them right, this proves just how easily you can turn off your audience:

 

  1. ‘Cheeky’

Oooh, just nipping out for a ‘cheeky’ pint are you, or having a ‘cheeky’ wine? No, you’re not, because neither of these things are cheeky. And if you think they are, then please enlighten me as to why?

 

  1. ‘lil’ and ‘ickle’

I actually found it hard to write these words down I hate them so much. It’s LITTLE. It’s not a long or hard-to-spell word, so please just scrap the stupid ‘I’m trying to sound cute’ abbreviations and stop causing my blood to boil.

 

  1. Wifey and hubby

It’s husband and wife and an abbreviation of either makes you sound either a) like a smug married person or b) about five years old. And your best friend is most certainly not your ‘wifey’, she’s just your friend.

 

  1. LOL

I’ve hated this since the first time I saw it, and my hatred has only got worse over the years. It’s just tacky and awful.

 

  1. ‘Wine o’clock’

This is a ridiculously overused phrase. If you’re an adult and you’re drinking wine, do you really have to broadcast it? No, because no one cares.

 

  1. ‘Peeps’

Overused and cheesy, plus it’s a word I imagine David Brent would use.

 

  1. Me thinks

I think you’ll find that the correct phrase is I think, and there’s absolutely no reason to try and change it.

 

  1. Nom nom

Why has this replaced yum? There was nothing wrong with yum and nom nom just sounds wrong. Plus, what does it even mean? Is it a noise you make whilst eating? A noise you make after eating? I seriously hope not.

 

  1. Vibes

Great vibes, bad vibes, birthday vibes, the list goes on. If you’re over 20 and use vibes it just makes you look like you’re trying too hard to be ‘down with the kids’.

 

  1. Vino

I don’t understand why a grown adult feels the need to call wine anything other than wine. There really is no need.

 

I’m sure I’ve offended some people with this post, but if I have then it’s very likely they’ve already offended me on my Facebook feed, so we’re even.

Anyway, rant over, so see ya later peeps, it’s wine o’clock and me thinks it’s time to have a cheeky vino with my ickle wifey. LOLZZZZZZZZZZZZ.